Sunday, August 23, 2009

Girls' Date

"Momma!" I turn to see Janie stopped at a rack of rather "dainty" women's underwear. "These are NOT modest," she says.

"I know. Can you believe that?!"

Next, she is captivated by a bright white mannequin noting and then poking her holey tights. "Momma, are these dead people?" She steps just beyond my peripheral and gasps, "Oh my word!" Why, that one has shorts as small as underwear.

And can you believe it's a normal sort of trendy store that I'd hardly think twice about if I'd gone shopping alone?


  1. My mothering mentors:

    Carolyn Ingalls (spunky, rational, sweet, resourceful, strong, creative, unconventional, wise)

    Bethany Schafer (spunky, rational, sweet, resourceful, strong, creative, unconventional, wise)

  2. I remember my three girls being like that when they were little too. Its like society hadn't spoiled them yet. If only you could box them up until they were all grown. Watch out for those middle school years! That's when you get kicked off the throne and they stop looking to you as being "the wise one" and start looking to their peers as being "the wise ones". And in their middle school and early high school eyes, the most permissive parent of their friends becomes the best parent. I'll tell you, with three teenage girls, these modesty and chastity issues are a daily all out WAR! Everyday it feels like Pig Woman vs. all Society! Its exhausting!!!

  3. First of all I have to say that I LOVE that picture of you two! It is amazing how we become oblivous to "normal" - whether appropriate or not. I can totally hear Emma asking if the manequins are dead people - in her very serious, inquisitive little voice.

  4. So how DO we hit the re-set button for modesty?

  5. When I was a kid, my folks didn't let me watch pg-13 movies until I was literally 13 years old. I was definitely the odd duck, but didn't really mind. When I was FINALLY 13, I went to see "Just one of the guys" at the theater with a bunch of girlfriends. There was a locker room scene where we saw naked back-sides.

    I was APPALLED. I was so uncomfortable, that I got up and walked out of the movie all by myself ("I shouldn't be watching that!"). Still the odd duck, evidently. Friends thought I was a prude. Maybe so.

    I resented being the odd one when it came to the ways of the world...and then I got a bit older. I realized that there are some things that everyone SHOULD be appalled by. I appreciated that my parents didn't expose me to that stuff from a young age. How could I even see a difference between this and that...never mind distinguish the rightness or wrongness of "this" and "that" if I'd been equally exposed to them as both NORMAL (one of Satan's favorite words, I'm sure).

    Yes, we are in the world...but not of the world, right?

    I'm doing the same kind of thing with my kids. When they happen to see something inappropriate, I just love to hear their shocked reaction. It tells me I'm doing a good job sheltering them.

    With my girls especially, I'm drilling in the "ladylike" thing. When they wear dresses or skirts, we do "bloomers" over undies (basically bike type shorts or cut off leggings) since it's not ladylike to show undies...they're little girls after all, and I want them to be able to run and play comfortably. We don't allow Brats dolls because they don't dress like ladies, and "brat" tells me that maybe they have bad attitudes.

    I'm thankful that my kids seem to get it...but aren't too resentful yet. I only hope that when they're out there without me, these years of lovingly teaching them what real beauty looks like will stick.

    I'm going on and on - lucky you, I stopped by to see you after having a dose of coffee! ;-)

  6. Great comments, and I love being a fly on the wall of that cute exchange between you two. :)

  7. The story and the picture both show two valuable characteristics: clean and natural. With them, true beauty can shine through.